(2/23/05) testing grandfather's cancer medicine; bigfoot-man super-sizes it

(Entered in paper journal at 5:45 AM at home in Harlem.)

Dream 1

I, one of my NYC Americorps coworkers (possibly MG), and one other male were all with my grandfather on the edge of some park in early fall. The park seemed to slope down from a high point to a wide field very evenly set and well manicured. The whole scene was bordered in massive, shady trees, and the lawn was flecked with yellow, orange, and red. At the beginning the slope was on the wide north end of the park. Then at some point it was on the wide south end.

We young men were there as guinea pigs to test my grandpa's new cancer medication. The medication was, as I can see now, a huge, white pill, not at all able to be swallowed, maybe as large as a hand, with a sweet, powdery external feeling. This pill would have all the same burning and sickening effects of intravenous chemotherapy, but it would not have those effects, and thus my grandpa was interested in it.

I was afraid to take the cancer medicine. But I didn't show my fear, because I figured we were doing something good for my grandpa. I also didn't want to show my fear because I didn't see any fear in MG's or XXXXX's face.

We had to take the pill and then eat medicine that basically looked like a hollow, synthesized version of a healthy brown bag lunch. We were then to go down onto the field and compete against each other in track and field-like events. We were testing if the medicine a) made us nauseous, b) affected our ability to perform up to our current athletic standard, and/or c) affected our ability to compete against each other wholeheartedly.

We were now on the field. The events skipped over the pill-taking. Then they skip-reversed to before the pill-taking. Then they skipped to some other moment where we stood in front of my grandpa. I was trying to figure out what point this was and if  had to go through the nerve-wracking medicine-taking and competitions again.

Now my grandpa may have said he had decided not to take the medicine after all.

Dream 2

I stood either with my friend PD or my friend and NYC Americorps crew mate KB at night at the edge of a chain link fence that bordered either a park or a vacant lot. I think it was a park because it feels like a small creek ran through it.

At the far end of this land was a man walking with a hamburger in his hand. The hamburger was wrapped in a fast-food joint's square wax-paper wrapper. The man walked with an uncanny floppiness, like in the videos purportedly capturing a view of Bigfoot. He also didn't seem  to have much of a head -- just a tiny, floating, black dot.

KB said, "Ah... there's someone who's obviously been super-sizing it." By this KB meant the man was obese. But I didn't think the man was obese.

But as the man got closer and closer, he appeared taller and fatter. He wore an untucked, maroon shirt with a white t-shirt underneath and either khaki pants or jeans.