Wednesday, January 18, 2017

(5/14/07) warding off a predator; afraid of a gas pump; flying hawk; "leave me alone!"; desert predators

(Entered in paper journal at 6 AM, on Q-train from Brooklyn in to Manhattan for work.)

Dream 1

I was traveling down a country road near dusk. The light was dim grey. I may have been riding a bicycle. There was a crowd of bicyclists behind me. Many of them may have been wearing pink riding shirts or riding pink bikes.

I looked forward again. I was riding with a child now. He asked me about going to a special school, possibly for autistic children. I told him that it wasn't a bad thing, and that it would help him.

We rode past a weird "animal" that stood to the right of a scraggly, dead or dying tree. The "animal" may also have been standing behind a straw dummy of a tree. I thought the animal was a wolf. It was tall, with a very shaggy, white coat. It had a dog's face and dark, or rather dim and murky, eyes. It may have been standing upright.

I felt that the animal wanted to attack the child and that it was waiting for one second for me to let my guard down so it could attack. I turned to it (it was to my left as we traveled down the right side of the road) and barked at it with a strange, howling voice. I thought this voice would fool the animal by making it think we were another animal, so that it shouldn't attack us or we would attack it.

It took a while to pass the animal. We may have passed another one a while later.

Dream 2

I was in a subway train with a group of girls. We had passed one stop. Some of the girls may have been depending on me to tell them when our stop was coming up. But now we were in a place that I couldn't recognize. We were under a bridge like a street would be under a bridge for elevated trains. But the bridge was very wide.

I saw as if I were outside the train. The train had come down from a slight, long slope on the right side of which was a tunnel lit like a subway platform. All the ground under the bridge was strung with rail line, all very close together, so the whole ground looked covered in steel.

I had to admit I didn't know where we were. One of the girls (I couldn't see any of the girls, and I'm not sure I was quite with them) said she knew where we were going and I was just an idiot. I felt like she was trying to make all the other girls fall in love with her.

The train turned and moved across all the tracks, leading toward a small dirt hill out from under the bridge. The train was now a vehicle like a Hummer, tan or beige.

We had to inspect or work on some place. I asked if it was all of some place. The woman who was now the leader said, "No. There's only two percent of this place that we need to worry about." She said it once again as if I should have known that.

We drove into a dusty area scattered with various industrial machinery. We pulled up to a filling station. The leader woman showed us how to put gas in the vehicle. The gas nozzle was just a big hose. The gas gushed out of it in huge flows.

We had to stick the nozzle in a hole at the top of a beige structure that looked like a propane tank. Inside the propane tank was something like a plastic jug. Something about the jug, hose, and tank had to be in alignment while the gas was flowing.

At one point one of the girls pulled the hose out of the tank. I was afraid to touch it because even the though the gas wasn't flowing right then, I was afraid that it would catch me by surprise and spray all over me, burning me up somehow.

All the girls told me to stop being afraid, to steady myself, that nothing bad was going to happen. I put the hose back into the tank. I could see that the gas was filling the tank around the plastic "jug."

Dream 3

Walking with a group of people in a desert on a fusey, purplish night, I saw a hawk fly over a small pool of water which was surrounded by chipped, red earth.

Dream 4

I sat next to a fattish, black man (who sat to my left). The man was getting too close to me. He tried to pull my checkbook out of my back pocket. I kept him from doing so. But now he was pinching my left leg, about four inches above the knee. I yelled at him, "Leave me alone!" He just laughed at me, like he was happy he had finally hurt me.

Dream 5

I was watching a program about some homeless shelter where people served huge bowls of beautiful looking minestrone to people. I thought, I wish I had the ability to make such good-looking food for myself.

I knelt "outside" a house (it felt like I was in a big living room). My oldest nephew stood in front of me. He had just spent time with my dad and his wife. My dad's wife stood in the doorway of the house, watching us.

I knew I had to keep from saying anything bad about my dad's wife or about my nephew staying with her. I even felt bad for saying, "I know it's nice, after you've stayed in a different place, just to get back to your own bed, where everything is familiar."

My nephew asked, "Don't you think while I'm here they should let me walk around?" Apparently my dad and his wife lived in the desert. I thought that if I stayed here, I'd like to walk around, too. Besides, my nephew was eleven now, wasn't he?

But I looked at my nephew. He was still so small. I touched his back (he wasn't wearing a t-shirt) and told him, "Could you wait a couple years before you go walking around? You're still small, and there are a lot of animals out there that can attack you."

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